Friday, March 4, 2011

Sometimes the things that the Lord asks of us don't always make sense. At least not at the time. And it can be hard to trust that it will all work out in the end because we don't know how it will. But we can trust that the Lord does. He knows the end from the beginning. We can only see a few threads but He can see the whole tapestry...the grand design. Today was a really hard day. Some stuff happened that I'd kind of seen coming for a while. But I've been praying and I know that somehow, some way the Lord will help me through this. And I know some day when things have settled themselves I'll look back and be glad that things happened the way that they have. But for right now it's sad and it still hurts. I honestly believe that these things are a test of my faith. To see if I'm willing to do the things that Lord asks of me, eve if it hurts and I don't want to. To see if in times of trial when I really am hurting I will have faith, and turn to the Lord and trust that even if I don't know how things will turn out he does. That's really what I'm trying to accomplish here. I don't why the Lord has chosen to ask of me the things that he has and I don't know how they will work out in the end. I don't know if things will end up in the way that I thought they would or if they will end a completely differently. But I know that they Lord does and that I'm going to try my hardest to put my faith in him, good or bad, through whatever comes.

2 comments:

Karen said...

My dearest Felicia - I know your heart is very, very heavy and I know something of your struggle - but my heart, my faith, my prayers, and my tears are with you now and always. May I suggest that you reread Elder Holland's April 2009 conference address entitled "None Were With Him". Also, I have a quote from Stephen E. Robinson that I love and buoys my spirit when I fear or worry or feel discouraged,
"All the negative aspects of human existence brought about by the Fall, Jesus Christ absorbed into himself. He experienced vicariously in Gethsemane all the private griefs and heartaches, all the physical pains and handicaps, all the emotional burdens and depressions of the human family. He knows the loneliness of those who don't fit in or who aren't handsome or pretty. He knows what it's like to choose up teams and be the last one chosen. He knows the anguish of parents whose children go wrong. He knows the private hell of the abused child or spouse. He knows all things personally and intimately because he lived them in the Gethsemane experience. Having personally lived a perfect life, he then chose to experience our imperfect lives. In that infinite Gethsemane experience, the meridian of time, the center of eternity, he lived a billion billion lifetimes of sin, pain, disease, and sorrow.

"God uses no magic wand to simply wave bad things into nonexistence. The sins he remits, he remits by making them his own and suffering them himself. Thes things can be shared and absorbed, but they cannot be simply wished or waved away. They must be suffered. Thus we owe him not only for our spiritual cleansing from sin, but for our physical, mental, and emotional healings as well, for he has borne these infirmities for us also. All that the Fall put wrong, the Savior in his atonement puts right. It is all part of his infinite sacrifice - of his infinite gift" (Believing Christ, 122-23).

I love you and know that you will get through all of this - beautifully - but in the meantime I'm here for you anytime.

The Rogers said...

Me too! I'm here if you ever need to talk. Trust me when I say "it" will happen, and when it does it will happen with ease and you will know it. Love you Georgina, and you are in our prayers.